As parents being a confident leader can help our children learn to depend on us to guide them throughout their lives. A part of being a confident leader calls us to be patient leaders.
Janet Lansbury author of the books, Parenting with Presence, and Parenting Without Power Struggles describes confident parenting as being a captain of the ship. If parents are not the “captain of the ship” in our homes, we end up succumbing to power struggles and negotiations with our families. In some cases when the child is in charge of the house, parents resort to bribes and threats, leaving a parent feeling desperate and out of control.
Some parents may feel uncomfortable with the idea of being called the captain of the ship. Consider though, that the reason you are the captain of the ship it isn’t because you are more worthy of respect but it is because you are the one most qualified for the job.
A good captain realizes that at times children will be unhappy, stressed out and at times they won’t like their captain very much. As parents we have to say “That is OK”. Children need to learn to live through these situations in order to grow up to become resilient adults. Too often parents try to make life so comfortable for their children that they don’t allow their children to learn to experience these emotions. Part of growing up is learning to deal with different situations, good or bad. When our children go through varying emotions they can come out of difficult situations with new knowledge on how to deal with their emotions next time. Often times we try to talk children out of emotions, rather than deal with them in a moment. Instead, consider guiding them through a storm rather than going around it.
Whether we realize it or not, our kids would rather us be strong leaders and disagree with them at times. Children need for us to be solid ground as we navigate them through life.
